What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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