What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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