What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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