What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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