What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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