What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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