What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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