Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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