What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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