When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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