Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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