Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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