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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?
In the piano!
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?
Fast food.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.
The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What did the clock do after it ate?
It went back four seconds!
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?
By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?
I'm still working on it.
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Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.
I decided to give it a shot!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?
None, because they were copycats
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?
With its sparrowchute.
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