Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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