Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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A seal walks into a club...
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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