Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .

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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.

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