Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish

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