Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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