Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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