Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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