Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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