Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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