Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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