Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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