Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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