Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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