One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
or
The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
or
Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
or
......... one jar.
or
I've been framed.
or
Because all his other wives support Hillary.
or
A jump rope.
or