Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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