Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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