Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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