Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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