Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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