Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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