Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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