Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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