Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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