Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva


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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.

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