Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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