Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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