Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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