Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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