Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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