Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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