Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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