Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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