Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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