Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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