Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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