Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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