Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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