Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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