Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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