Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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