Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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