Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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