Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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