Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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