Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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