Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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