Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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