Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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