Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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