Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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