Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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