Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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