Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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