Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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