Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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