Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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