Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!

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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.

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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986

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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.


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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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