Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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