Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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