Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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