Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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