Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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