Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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