Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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