Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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