Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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