Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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