Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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