Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.

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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.

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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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