Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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