Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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