Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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