Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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