Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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