Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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