Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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