Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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