Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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