Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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