Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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