Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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